I love how whenever I write a really sincere post in this blog thing, I inevitably look back on it the next day with mixed feelings. Part of me is like, I am really RAW, emoting all over the internet and such. But most of me is like, PERSON THAT I WAS YESTERDAY, YOU ARE A LITTLE BIT LAME. Balance in all things, my friends. Balance is key.
No worries today though, because I’m not planning on assaulting you with anymore sentimental bullshit for a while. I’ve got much more important intelligence to communicate because I SAW THE FERRET. Hell yes.
Where should I start… Ought I to begin with the way he lives in aquarium and seems to spend most of his time burrowing flounderingly into piles of cedar shavings? So cute/desperate-seeming. How about the little, pokey bones that stand up along his back, thin as bristles on a porcupine? No, I think I’ll start by telling you that, while I did not touch him, he looked MOIST. Indeed, friends. Plus, unlike Cameron, who actually has a little bit of grey peach fuzz, this animal is totally fucking bald and WAY pink. I stood there and stared at him for about five solid minutes, unable to tear myself away. I think that ought to be enough of the story to convey that my overall reaction to this little guy was UM EW with a side of OMG I LOVE YOU.
The old man working the store (father of the dude who owns Cameron and his ferret companion) did not remember the moist one’s name, but I think a good name would be Wet Pencil Eraser. Old man made it clear that he was as mysterified as I was by Wet Pencil Eraser’s presence in the store, but not half as delighted. He confirmed that WPE had been obtained because he’s “supposed to keep Cameron company”, but opined that “Cameron doesn’t even seem to notice that he’s there.” Aw.
Furthermore, he shared, Cameron’s lassaiz-faire affect is actually oweing to the fact that he likes to sneak out of the store mid-day and enjoy a few pints at the Four P’s. Oh god I wish I were just a LITTLE more gullible… Anyone interested in helped me breathalyze a cat?
I will help you breathalyze that cat.
had a friend with one of those cats once.
like a little leathery baby.
it was captivating.
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